If you are over 21, chances are you are a working professional...toiling away for the profit of a larger company aka 'The Corporate'. In todays world, more often than not,a vast majority of us are white collared 'labourers' who indirectly work for yet another exorbitantly paid 'labourer' (aka our bosses)
From the experience of anyone who has ever worked for a life-(and happiness) sucking corporation, here's decoding what your boss says and what he/she means.
"We'll discuss this later"
It means "I don't have any valid reasons to give you now so we'll discuss this when I can come up with some harebrained logic that will confuse you enough to get you off this argument"
"I want you to work on ABC's team"
It means "I like ABC a lot cos he/she sucks up to me (in or out of the boardroom/ bed room) and since I want ABC to look good without getting him/her to do any actual work, I'd rather you be the donkey for now."
"You are doing such a good job" It means "I urgently need that report and since you're the only one who I know can finish it in time by screwing it up the least, here's some more work for you to do so you can spend yet another night in the office"
"You are the only one I trust with this task/report/project" It means "I am paying you a compliment so that you feel better about staying back after office hours to do a job that I completely forgot about until my boss asked me for it an hour back"
"You have so much potential. But if you move now, you will waste it at the new workplace."
It means "Who else will I drop my last minute work on when my boss kicks my butt on a Friday evening? Where else will I find another willing idiot who forgets the need for a social life in order to be my donkey for the weekend? God forbid, I may even have to do the work myself *Shudder*"
"I know we promised you a raise this year, but HR has only allocated a much smaller budget for our team. I will see that we close the gap next year"
It means "I was hoping you would have forgotten our conversation from last year. HR has given me enough money to give the entire team a decent pay raise, but I have to ensure my cronies/minions are paid thrice what they are worth so that you can do your job (and theirs) for 1/3 of your actual pay. I assure you I will repeat this lame excuse at the end of the next appraisal as well. By then you will be so over-worked and frustrated, that you will resign and I will find another willing (and ignorant) slave to take your place."
"I have a good team"
It means "I am king of the world and you my serfs will forever be tied to my fiefdom. Atleast as long as you shall work for this company. *Insert manic evil laughter*"
From the experience of anyone who has ever worked for a life-(and happiness) sucking corporation, here's decoding what your boss says and what he/she means.
"We'll discuss this later"
It means "I don't have any valid reasons to give you now so we'll discuss this when I can come up with some harebrained logic that will confuse you enough to get you off this argument"
"I want you to work on ABC's team"
It means "I like ABC a lot cos he/she sucks up to me (in or out of the boardroom/ bed room) and since I want ABC to look good without getting him/her to do any actual work, I'd rather you be the donkey for now."
"You are doing such a good job" It means "I urgently need that report and since you're the only one who I know can finish it in time by screwing it up the least, here's some more work for you to do so you can spend yet another night in the office"
"You are the only one I trust with this task/report/project" It means "I am paying you a compliment so that you feel better about staying back after office hours to do a job that I completely forgot about until my boss asked me for it an hour back"
"You have so much potential. But if you move now, you will waste it at the new workplace."
It means "Who else will I drop my last minute work on when my boss kicks my butt on a Friday evening? Where else will I find another willing idiot who forgets the need for a social life in order to be my donkey for the weekend? God forbid, I may even have to do the work myself *Shudder*"
"I know we promised you a raise this year, but HR has only allocated a much smaller budget for our team. I will see that we close the gap next year"
It means "I was hoping you would have forgotten our conversation from last year. HR has given me enough money to give the entire team a decent pay raise, but I have to ensure my cronies/minions are paid thrice what they are worth so that you can do your job (and theirs) for 1/3 of your actual pay. I assure you I will repeat this lame excuse at the end of the next appraisal as well. By then you will be so over-worked and frustrated, that you will resign and I will find another willing (and ignorant) slave to take your place."
"I have a good team"
It means "I am king of the world and you my serfs will forever be tied to my fiefdom. Atleast as long as you shall work for this company. *Insert manic evil laughter*"
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