The Covenant for a Girls’ Night Out
1. Even if members are aged 25 and above, it must always be referred to a ‘girls’ night out.
2. Three is the most suitable number of girlfriends for a girls’ night out. The maximum number should not exceed four. Rare exceptions can be made for a fifth.
3. Boys are strictly not allowed - before, during and after a girls’ night out. Male trespassers will be persecuted.
4. If a girl abandons her girlfriends for a boy at any point in time, she will be ostracised from at least two of the subsequent girls’ nights out. Abandonment of girlfriends will result in a harsh penalty that comprises name-calling and taunting the accused.
5. Adhere to the golden sextet of girl talk:
- Reveal at least one deep, dark secret per night.
- Bitch, bitch, bitch.
- Judge everything, everyone and everything you think about everyone.
- Pontificate to no end.
- Vent. Confess. Faff.
- As you think, so shall you speak.
6. Declare undying love for each other on a frequent basis.
7. Indulge in uncontrollable fits of giggles.
8. Never order a small drink.
9. Have epiphanies about your life.
10. Have epiphanies about girlfriends’ lives.
11. Have epiphanies in general.
12. Be blatantly and proudly cliché – discuss boys, relationships and feelings. This is our version of locker room talk.
13. Feel free to indulge in PDA with girlfriends.
14. Only eye contact with random cute boys is permitted. Engaging random cute boys in conversation will be seen as deliberate violation of tenets three and four.
15. Never tuck tummies in. A girlfriend’s fat and flab shall not be frowned upon by her comrades.
16. Vow to remain friends forever.
17. Vow to take a girls only trip to Europe.
18. Vow to put chicks before d****.
19. Make many such vows.
20. Text each other post-girls’ night out long, mushy, heartfelt messages.
21. Plan the next girls’ night out.
This is a shout-out to all my girlfriends or my ‘ya-ya sisterhood’ as a reader mockingly noted on this blog. Believe me when I say this – a girls’ night out works better than therapy. Always, always make time for girlfriends. Because when the parents nag, the boyfriends ditch and the world seems like a hellhole, a girlfriend will always have your back. You go girls!
PS: If the boys, who valiantly attempt to read this, declare the covenant as cheesy, corny and oh-so-girly, I know that you’ll enjoy a boys’ night out with equal relish, sans the PDA I assume.
P.S.: THIS ISN'T AN ORIGINAL COMPILATION. Read it in one of the HT columns by Tasneem Nashrulla...just lurrved it & took the liberty of copy-pasting ;)
And i have taken the liberty of copy-posting this from my dear Eli's Notes...and since it hit home i just wanted to dedicate it to all my Ladies whom i miss oh-so dearly...You rock my Chicas!...and i just can't wait till the above mentioned happens [which given the stoopid assignments i have seems like a long way off:(]
oh n Ps: I Lowe u all...Mwah!!!
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